Hi, hi, I know. You’re not reading this, nobody is, but I had to report back with THE RESOLUTION OF MY LIFE BLOCKBUSTER SAGA. Seriously, it just now came to a close this past weekend, and who else could I even tell besides my deserted wordpress? Since I’m pretty sure this is the only place that the story was ever shared in the first place.
OK so, as I told you long ago, I once formed an unbreakable bond with the bald dude at Blockbuster when he consoled me in my desolation over the fact that they did not have a copy of Charlie Bartlett in stock. This bond was further deepened the next week when he SAVED a copy of Charlie Bartlett for me without my even ASKING him to, and we continued to share a special connection through all of my subsequent, frequent visits to Blockbuster (He started to affectionately call me “Charlie” after my initial freak-out, which added a sweet note of quirkiness to our already quirky friendship.) In case I wasn’t ALREADY hugely indebted to him for saving me a C.B. dvd, I became even more so when he heroically jumped my car when its battery died in the parking lot.
Unfortunately, we began to drift a bit in our friendship when I left for school. And also when my family got Netflix. However, even with these severe roadblocks, I would still return to Blockbuster on the odd weekend here and there, and we would share an exuberant high five and reminisce about all of our beautiful memories. WELL, this past weekend I went home, and as I drove past Blockbuster I saw that it had finally happened. Massive yellow signs coated all of the windows shouting, CLOSING! and CLEARANCE! and EVERYTHING MUST GO!, and I knew that my beloved Blockbuster was, at last, closing its doors forever. Although this was a tragedy, it was also an excellent chance to acquire movies on the cheap, so my siblings and I set off to do a sweep of the store in search of any quality films that we might want to add to our collection.
We thoroughly explored the shelves, but unfortunately all of the good movies had been retrieved long ago. I was prepared to give up, when, suddenly, as I sifted through the rack of $2 movies, I saw Charlie Bartlett resting unassumingly at the bottom of one of the last piles. My heart practically broke with nostalgia and irony! I lovingly extracted the DVD from the stack, and brought it to the register where, of course, my dear, bald friend was faithfully waiting.
“I suppose this brings our story full circle…” I laughed ruefully, placing the film on the counter.
“Charlie! I worried I wouldn’t see you again before we closed. But somehow I knew you’d come in and buy that.” He peeled the price tag off of the box, and handed me the movie without scanning it. ”It’s yours. I’m pretty sure you’re the only person who ever cared that this movie existed.”
“It’s not even that good,” I admitted. We laughed, the kind of heartbreaking, reluctant laugh that you let out when something is accidentally funny at a funeral.
“I guess I’ll pretty much never see you again.” I looked hard at him, desperately trying to commit everything about his wonderful, bald head to memory.
“Damn Netflix,” he sighed.
“Thanks for that time you jumped my car,” I said sincerely. ”Truly, I will never forget it.”
“And I won’t forget you, Charlie.” He replied. I reached across the counter and, slowly, we high-fived one last time, the sound of our hands echoing across the nearly empty store.
I gathered my movie and my siblings, and gave one more wave as we walked out of Blockbuster for the last time.
And that, my friends, is the end of my storied and sentimental affair with Blockbuster and its bald employee.
