word(s)

ALRIGHT so it’s been a whiiile…I just really haven’t felt compelled to write on here lately.  But RELAX, because here I am nerding it out at 11:00pm on a non-school night, coming up with a craft for Head Start/watching She’s the Man/writing on here.

…I know, I KNOW.  You wish you were me.

This craft-coming-up-with endeavor is sort of an uphill climb, though, because like.  Unless there’s some major holiday on the horizon, crafts really don’t just make themselves YOU KNOW? You know.  So right now I’m stuck between making a paper kite, and a pipecleaner leprechaun, which is clearly a tough decision because like….how DO you choose between two equally genius ideas??  I am at a loss.

In other news, the musical is OVER, and has been for like a week or whatever.  And even though it went very well and I enjoyed it, I have just been in such a better MOOD since it’s ended.  Seriously all this past week I just felt relieved and chill and at ease, so the play was clearly stressing me out more than I realized.

OH MY GOD ok, buckle up because I have the SADDEST STORY OF ALL TIME to share with you.  Hopefully I can finish writing it before I just like, lose complete control and shlump on my keyboard and bawl, because it’s just that bad.

Ahem, so.  My family is not really like, a technologically advanced group, and we don’t have cable.  (I know…I could just stop here, and it would be a sad story).  Well we also don’t have Netflix, but we DO have Blockbuster Online, but like who cares, the POINT IS that I make frequent trips to the good old Blockbuster up the street on Ridge Pk.  Like, EXTREMELY frequent trips.  And I have sort of come to think of that place as a home away from home, and I have bonded with all the employees there and they adore me.  Particularly this one employee who is completely bald, but not like old man bald, just bald, and he is MY FAVORITE BLOCKBUSTER GUY OF ALL TIME.  And we have a deep and indestructible connection based upon our totally compatible movie tastes, and all of our random, priceless conversations.  And he is just the best.  And when I was DYING to rent Charlie Bartlett, but they didn’t have it, he helped me find another movie, and then he HELD Charlie Bartlett for me as soon as it came in even though I didn’t ask him to.  And when the battery died in my dad’s car because I spent so long looking for a movie, and I had a nervous breakdown because I was pretty certain that my dad would destroy me for killing his car’s battery, Baldie came outside—-completely neglecting his behind the counter duties!!—-and helped me locate the jumper cables in the trunk and jump start the car!  And every time I forget my Blockbuster card and/or photo ID, he always lets me slide.  And he is just the MAN, and he has this lovable round face, and I feel like we’re married, practically. 

So TONIGHT, since it isn’t a school night, I headed up to Blockbuster OBVIOUSLY to rent a movie.  But when I got there, the door was locked, and I realized that on Mondays they close at 10 so I was fifteen minutes late or whatever.  So I had a good cry, and then started to head back to the car, but of COURSE Baldie (I don’t know why I don’t know his name…it’s fucking disgraceful) popped his head out of the door at the last minute and said hello to me, because no locked door is going to get in the way of a friendship like ours.  So I chatted with him, and expressed my distress at the fact that they were closed, and complained about how I was going to have to chill around and watch She’s the Man instead.  (Which is really nothing to complain about, because I love this movie so much)  Well, when I said that, Baldie replied, “hmmm, you’re going to have to get used to this feeling, because we filed for bankruptcy and are closing before too long.  Netflix and shit really did us in.” 

Well, my friends.  I basically felt like someone had STABBED ME IN THE HEART MULTIPLE TIMES WITH A RAZOR SHARP BLADE.  Oh my GOD!  What the fuck am I supposed to DO???  My life and entertainment depend like 90% on the existence of that Blockbuster store, and plus how the HELL am I supposed to figure out Baldie’s actual name, let alone marry him so that he can take care of me for all of my days, if they just shut down and I never see him again?!?!?! 

:SOB:

worst. news. ever.

Anyway I should probably go, even though I feel like I had some actual legit news to share with you, especially since it’s been so long.  But I just got so caught up in that story!!  And now I am a total emotional basketcase from telling it, because I’ve realized what an empty black hole my life is going to become thanks to Netflix.  And also I need to devote my full attention to She’s the Man right now, because Duke just like came out of the bushes in his tux and I love this part. Siiiiggghh.  But I’ll try to write again before like, October or whatever, so don’t fret about that.

P.S.  If you are some kind of stalker fact-checker, and you happen to go to the Blockbuster on Ridge, there are two bald guys, and mine is the one who is not the skinny one with glasses.
P.P.S.  I am considering chaining myself to the store?  Leave your contact info if you’re in.